In honor of my recently published book, over the next few months Fridays will be devoted to excerpts from, Fierce: A New Generation of Female Empowerment. I wrote this as a follow up to More Than Just a Girl with all the information I didn’t add in there. It was written to inform and empower tween and teen girls. Where as Fierce is for those who have a desire to get the most out of life. They want to make positive change, but are not sure how to make it happen. It is for young women who will soon be out of high school and on their way to college or some other adventure. My hope is that you will share these posts with all the girls and women in your life. Let them know the book can be read for free online or a a soft cover book is available for sale at Bookemon.com.
Fierce is more than just girl power and aggression. It is a state of being that allows anyone to shine. The book starts with problem solving and critical thinking skills, tools we all need to survive no matter our gender, race or class. Then it delves into important issues such as women’s rights, health, violence prevention, education, and activism. Every section has examples of positive role models to look up to and questions to ponder. It concludes with resources and references so readers can decide for themselves how they can use their inner fierce female to survive. This first post includes the introduction to my book. It would mean so much to me if you left a comment below.
Danger has been a part of my life ever since I picked up a pen and wrote. Nothing is more perilous than truth in a world that lies. -Nawal El Saadawi
Book Excerpt: Introduction
It is time for girls to stop believing in this so called “Girl Power” the mass media is selling us, our families and our cultures. It is not power, but simply a play on feminism used to sell products. The media is not just here for our entertainment, but rather exists to make a profit. It sells whatever new trend is around. There is such a thing as girl power, but it is not simultaneously playing sports and looking sexy or being a millionaire actress and fashion icon. Just like being a man isn’t limited to using violence and authority to get what they want, being a woman is not limited to aspiring to be the prettiest and most popular to get what we want. It is time to be fierce and fight for a world where equality, truth and knowledge are our most cherished qualities.
This book is a guide to show you the different ways you can be fierce by focusing on what is important to you. Live in a way so that when you get knocked down you know inside that you are capable of recovering and continuing on your own journey. You have the power to be a changemaker. It is possible to make a difference in our world and isn’t only for those with immense wealth or celebrity status.
This is a collection of information and resources so you can empower yourself and then empower others. It is information that I learned first hand as well as from watching others live their lives and make changes that I never knew were possible. This book may not change your life, but my hope is that it gives you a new way to look at the world. I want you to see a world where each and every one of us has the power to create positive change in our communities and the world as well as have basic information about health and rights. Decide for yourself what you use from this book and live life in a way that makes you feel good about your choices.
Each section has questions for you to ponder. Learning to follow or lead is often included with doing so blindly. The problem with doing what is expected without question is that we lose an opportunity to find new solutions and to progress. To be a fierce woman is to overcome your fears of asking and wondering what if. What if we try a different method? What will happen if things change? What if I try and fail? You will fail, it is inevitable. Learn to fail with an open mind and you will learn to succeed in a different way.
Yes, women and other oppressed minorities have made great strides toward equality. It is fantastic that those who were once oppressed and considered second class citizens or not even human have made strides in many countries.
We have abilities such as our right to vote, to become officials in the government, to not be owned, to have a career other than motherhood or servants, and to choose a life we want. In addition to these advancements, we need to continue moving forward. Girls are not sugar and spice or princesses and drama queens. We are aggressive, strong, independent thinkers.
We are as capable as any man. Let’s celebrate these victories, but be aware that we still have a long time until equality for all exists all the time.
Aggressive doesn’t mean you have to be loud, pushy, manipulative, or dominating. You can be quiet and reserved and still be a leader. Leaders are a mix of firm decision making, listening to everybody’s ideas, and knowledge. People who only yell or those who are afraid to speak up are not ideal leaders. We naturally follow charismatic leaders and this is a good thing because in some situations hope and instant results is what we need to survive. However the danger in leading with no fear AND no knowledge is that you only can go so far or go in the wrong direction. It is important to educate yourself before making a decision.
Be aggressive by educating yourself and using that knowledge to stand firm in the face of doubters and haters. Don’t bow down to someone just because they act tough. As women we must learn to stand up and speak up. Rosa Parks was a leader. She was a quiet person who decided that she had experienced enough abuse and would no longer stand for it. She did not yell or throw punches; by sitting on that bus she made a statement of passive resistance. And it worked.
Strong isn’t just about being the smartest, fastest or biggest. Inner strength to overcome our fears and anxieties is inside each of us. We just have to learn to be aware of this fact. Become aware of your unique talents and gifts. Use those to make it through each day and to fight for injustice. The sayings, “Lead by example”, “Be the change you want to see” or “Be a good role model” are all similar.
Telling people what to do sometimes works, but mostly breeds resentment or creates blind followers, aka sheeple. On the other hand showing how or encouraging people to do things and letting them see the results creates lasting change that is made by another person. So to be a strong leader, lead by example and create the positive change our world needs.
We also need to be independent. This is not just about being able to travel alone or have a job and pay our own bills. It is about thinking without a group or traditional mindset. We live in a world with billions of ideas forced on us everyday. What is right or wrong for you will often be different than another. We are told what we should think about sex and how we look to what we should believe and who we should love or hate.
Educate yourself and be open to what is different. When you have an opportunity to learn something new than give it all you got. You may feel nervous or ill equipped at first, but once you get used to an activity it becomes easier…. Continue reading at Bookemon.com.
What was your inspiration or what necessitated you to begin this adventure? I grew up in a very open-minded and accepting catholic household. One of my cousins “came out” when I was six years old. From then on I saw first hand some of the violence and difficulties he faced. Through high school, college, and even in my personal life now I have seen family, friends, and community members victimized simply for who they love. No one has the right to hurt others unless in true self-defense. As a martial artist I feel it is my obligation to teach our loved ones how to defend themselves against hate crimes. The saying “with great power comes great responsibility” is the best way of explaining why.
Wise Women Don’t Worry, Wise Women Don’t Sign the Blues, by Jane Claypool. Sometimes a title is the best part of a book and sometimes it is just the tip of awesomeness. I LOVED this book. I read it awhile ago right after a sad break up. I was bummed about that, a job I didn’t like, and relative lack of direction with life. This book was therapeutic and a wake up call as the author shares her own un-sugarcoated experiences with life. This part of her story ends well for her, but not after learning many lessons the hard way. As if there is another way!
Individual Empowerment 